Saturday, April 12, 2014

Life and Hope from Suicide

I process loss by writing, and making art and music. Here I wrote a poem about it and laid it down on canvas. If you'd like to read the entire poem, I have it on my March 21 posting, 'Remembering Evan.'  March 21 was my birthday.  This year it was kind of a birthday to just skip.  Just not in the mood.
The flower represents life and hope. I obliterated the words in places because things in life are often hard to understand, and we are left with many questions. The painting has many layers, representing the many difficulties to be overcome after suicide. The tally marks represent the days of Evan's life. They do not completely cover the painting because there were not enough days. Miss you, Evan.

Although these days have been difficult and miserable, they have oftentimes been poignant and inspiring as well.

I am inspired to live my life well.  To live my life big, and to touch people.  Although suicide is a terrible waste, death itself reminds us of the preciousness of life; indeed, how alive we are!

What I have learned is that every single person that comes into my life is special.  That person is made in God's image and deserves my love, interest and tender care.  With Christ as my center, I am indebted to Him and must share Him with others. I know I'll see Evan again, because he was a child of Christ.  That is hope. To go through this life without hope is the biggest tragedy of all.


  1. Read your post on Homewood and wanted you to know I'm praying for your family. My heart breaks for you and Evan's family. We lost my cousin to suicide 2 yrs ago so I understand those emotions of disbelief, pain, sadness, guilt. Unfortunately my cousin wasn't saved so it was a doubly heartbreaking loss. Just know my thoughts and prayers are with your daughter, you and family as you journey toward healing.

    1. Thank you so much, Lisa. You know, these are things we just don't like to talk about. Maybe if people would start talking about what really matters, it wouldn't happen so much. We can be a part of that.